The Woman I Met at 58

‍ ‍For the woman who is still looking for herself in the rubble.

‍ ‍‍ ‍✦ ✦ ✦

‍ ‍Let me tell you about a woman I met.

‍ ‍I did not meet her at a conference.

‍ ‍Or in a coffee shop.

‍ ‍Or at one of those networking events where everyone introduces themselves by what they do instead of who they are.

‍ ‍I met her quietly.

‍ ‍In the middle of the rebuild.

‍ ‍After life had stripped away so many of the things I thought defined me.

‍ ‍ ‍The marriage.

‍ ‍The role I had carried.

‍ ‍The future I had imagined.

‍ ‍The identity I had wrapped around being everything to everyone else.

‍ ‍‍ When the noise finally settled…‍she was there.

‍ ‍✦ ✦ ✦

‍ ‍

The first time I noticed her, I almost did not recognize her.

‍ She was quieter than I expected.

‍ ‍Not quiet because she had nothing to say.

‍ ‍Quiet because she no longer felt the need to explain herself.

‍ ‍‍She was steadier.

‍ ‍More confident.

‍ ‍Not in herself.

‍ ‍In God.

‍ And as I got to know her, I realized there was so much I had never seen.

‍ ‍‍I learned just how strong she really was.

‍ ‍Not the kind of strength that demands attention.

‍ ‍The kind that survives what it never should have had to survive.

‍ ‍The kind that keeps getting up when no one is watching.

‍ The kind that continues believing God when the answers have not yet arrived.

‍ ‍‍I learned how resilient she was.

‍ ‍She had endured disappointments that could have made her bitter.

‍ ‍Losses that could have made her quit.

‍ ‍Heartbreak that could have convinced her love was too risky.

‍ ‍Yet somehow…‍ ‍she was still standing.

‍ ‍I learned how deeply she was loved.

‍ ‍Not just by God, though His love alone would have been enough.

‍ ‍But by other people too.

‍ ‍Friends who never stopped calling.

‍ Children who believed in her.

‍ ‍People who quietly reminded her that she mattered.

‍ ‍‍For years she had been working so hard to receive love from someone who did not know how to love themselves.

‍ ‍How could someone teach me my worth when they had never discovered their own?

‍ ‍‍ ‍I finally understood something that changed how I saw the past.

‍ ‍Sometimes what looks like arrogance is really insecurity wearing armor.

‍ ‍Sometimes the loudest confidence hides the deepest emptiness.

‍ ‍And I had spent years trying to earn something that was never mine to earn.

‍ ‍‍Love was never supposed to be a performance.

‍ ‍✦ ✦ ✦

‍ ‍Some of what I discovered surprised me.

‍ ‍Some of it did not.

‍ ‍Some of it was simply the truth I had forgotten.

‍ ‍‍ ‍For years I believed I was too sensitive.

‍ ‍I had heard it enough times that eventually I accepted it.

‍ ‍"You take things too personally."
"You think too deeply."
"You care too much."

‍ ‍‍I also believed I cared too much about doing things well.

‍ ‍I have always wanted to do things with excellence.

‍ ‍Not because I wanted perfection.

‍ ‍But because I believed that if something was worth doing, it was worth doing well.

‍ ‍Yet I was often told…

‍ ‍"You go too far."
"It doesn't have to be that good."
"Why do you always have to make everything such a big deal?"

‍ ‍‍Little by little, I began apologizing for the very qualities God had placed inside me.

‍ ‍‍ ‍But when I met this woman…

‍ ‍I saw her differently.

‍ ‍‍She was not too sensitive.

‍ ‍She was compassionate.

‍ ‍She noticed what others overlooked.

‍ ‍She heard what people were trying not to say.

‍ ‍She felt deeply because God had given her a heart that was never meant to become hard.

‍ ‍‍ ‍And her desire for excellence?

‍ ‍It was never something to apologize for.

‍ ‍It was stewardship.

‍ ‍It was honoring God with whatever He had placed in her hands.

‍ ‍✦ ✦ ✦

‍ ‍There was one more thing I had been wrong about.

‍ ‍For years I called her a people pleaser.

‍ ‍I thought she cared too much about what everyone else thought.

‍ ‍I thought she needed everyone's approval.

‍ ‍‍ ‍But God gently corrected me.

‍ ‍She was not trying to please everyone.

‍ ‍She was crying out to be seen.

‍ ‍To be valued.

‍ ‍To know she mattered.

‍ ‍To believe she was enough.

‍ ‍‍ The beautiful thing is that once she truly understood she had already been fully seen by God…

‍ ‍she stopped chasing validation from people.

‍ ‍She stopped auditioning for acceptance.

‍ ‍She stopped trying to prove her worth.

‍ ‍‍ ‍

Because worth is not something we earn.

‍ ‍It is something our Creator declares.

‍ ‍✦ ✦ ✦

‍ ‍I was fifty-eight when I met her.

‍ ‍And then I realized…

‍ ‍the woman I had been searching for…was me.

‍ ‍Not the wife.

‍ Not the career.

‍ ‍Not the titles.

‍ ‍Not the version of me shaped by someone else's expectations.

‍ ‍The woman God had been forming all along.

‍ ‍‍ ‍

She had been there beneath every season.

‍ ‍Beneath every disappointment.

‍ ‍Beneath every role.

‍ ‍Beneath every expectation.

‍ ‍Waiting patiently for the rubble to clear.

‍ ‍

✦ ✦ ✦

‍ ‍

I think this is one of the gentlest miracles of rebuilding.

‍ ‍‍ ‍God is not asking you to become someone else.

‍ ‍He is uncovering the woman He created before the world ever told you who you were supposed to be.

‍ ‍‍ ‍Before the titles.

‍ ‍Before the responsibilities.

‍ ‍Before the criticism.

‍ ‍Before the heartbreak.

‍ ‍Before someone else's opinion became louder than His voice.

‍ ‍‍ ‍He already knew you.

‍ ‍He was shaping you then.

‍ ‍And He has never stopped.

‍ ‍

✦ ✦ ✦

‍ ‍If you are standing in the rubble today, stop asking yourself,

‍ ‍

"Who am I supposed to become?"

‍ ‍Instead, ask the Father,

‍ ‍"Who have You been forming all along?"

‍ ‍‍ ‍Then be still.

‍ ‍Listen.

‍ ‍Watch.

‍ ‍‍ You will begin to recognize her.

‍ ‍In the way you no longer apologize for healthy boundaries.

‍ ‍In the way you speak with quiet confidence instead of fear.

‍ ‍In the way you spend time with God because you want to, not because you feel guilty.

‍ ‍In the way you choose peace over proving yourself.

‍ ‍‍ ‍Little by little…‍ ‍she will introduce herself.

‍ ‍

‍ ‍

And when she does…
I think you're going to like her.

‍ ‍✦ ✦ ✦

‍ ‍The book of Jeremiah says,

‍ ‍"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart."

‍ ‍— Jeremiah 1:5

‍ ‍Read that again.

‍ Before there was a marriage.

‍ ‍Before there was success.

‍ ‍Before there was failure.

‍ ‍Before there was rejection.

‍ ‍Before anyone else had an opinion about who you should be…

‍ ‍‍ ‍God already knew exactly who He created.

‍ ‍‍ ‍

Friend, you are not building a brand new woman.

‍ ‍You are finally meeting the one God has been writing into existence since before you took your first breath.

‍ ‍‍ ‍I met her at fifty-eight.

‍ ‍Maybe you'll meet her today.

‍ ‍‍ ‍‍ ‍✦ ✦ ✦

‍ ‍One More Thing, Before You Go

‍ ‍Today I wanted to share something deeply personal with you. Many of you have walked this journey with me through these Saturday letters. Before the book is released, I wanted you to be among the first to hear one of the songs inspired by my story.

‍ ‍I pray it encourages you and reminds you that God is never finished writing our stories.

‍ ‍The song is called

‍ ‍Woman at Fifty-Eight

‍ ‍‍ ‍Tap here to listen on Suno

Tap the link above .

‍ ✦ ✦ ✦

‍ ‍

Walking with you,

Your sister in the rebuild,

‍ ‍Kimberly

‍ ‍

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What Survived the Fire